Fear Of…

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Fear Of…

Fear is a big part of recovery. It is not always a bad thing. We had fear when we were drinking, using. We drank so that we wouldn’t feel fear. We were afraid of everything. Getting caught, not having enough, knowing we had to stop, living without it. Then when we got sober, we had a fear of the future. How would we live without a drink? How would we face the consequenses of things we had done? How would we get through a day, deal with issues, feelings, emotional and sometimes physical pain, without our drug of choice? Then we did our inventory and we had to look fear straight on and face memories and thoughts we had pushed far away, into the back of our minds. That’s when I knew, I no longer wanted to live in fear. That fear had run my life, made all of my decisions, and drove me deeper into addiction. Writing down my fears opened my eyes and helped me to move forward, and as I live my life in sobriety today, I address fears as they come. The good fear is the one that keeps me from picking up again, the fear that says, if I drink, I lose everything I have worked for. That’s a good fear. Today I know the difference and this program gives me the tools to address all my fears, one at a time.