Common things I hear from addicts in the 12 step meetings are “When will I get my family’s trust back?” and “When can I make my amends for my addiction?” It is great to feel remorse and want to make the situation right with their loved ones, but it takes time. Let’s face it, when we get sober many of us are not the same people as when we were using substances, therefore we become more aware of the past. So when we get to step 9 and make our amends, it does not stop there. Changing the way we live is a lifetime process and perhaps the most major amend we can make. We show our amends through actions, not just words. We may not be at step 9 yet, but we want to show our loved ones we want to get better.  So each day we do amends by doing the next right thing and the way we are “making it right” is shown through our actions, not our words. The ones we love will see it rather than us having to tell them. Trust me, that will mean more! Then when we get to step 9 our words will line up with our behaviors.

– Alumni Relations Specialist