Many alcohol and drug rehabilitation centers introduce clients to some sort of support group program, not only as a part of initial recovery, but also as a sobriety tool to use throughout their lives. Options include Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or Narcotics Anonymous (NA), both of which incorporate the use of sponsors. How does this benefit you? 

Working the Steps

The 12-Step philosophy is simple: by establishing a foundation of support and a step-by-step process for recognizing, acknowledging, and managing addiction, a person can create a more focused sober life. 

Here are the 12 Steps as published by AA. While there are variations in wording to be more inclusive or express the mission of a particular group, this is the basic format. Each step program has supplemental material as well that outlines how to incorporate different traditions, tenants, and other important factors, along with meeting attendance. Over time, some people might attend the free 12-Step meetings once a week or every other week, while others find more frequent attendance helps point their sobriety compass true north. 

However, when someone is new to recovery, the 12-Step system is often a daily lifeline to understanding yourself and aspects of your addiction. You’ll work each step in order but can always spend more time on one or go back to another, based on what you’re discovering about your sobriety and how you’re redefining your purpose. While there’s no deadline to complete a 12-Step program, the ongoing goal is to craft a deliberate path of progress to reinforce long-lasting recovery and prolonged health. 

Additionally, no matter where you are on a recovery journey, there will always be people who understand what you’re going through, including all the wonderful joys and inevitable sorrows in life, and be attentive to your desire to maintain sobriety. 

The Role of a 12-Step Sponsor

Post-treatment support groups offer one-to-one mentoring to help you not only progress through a 12-Step program, but also expand your trust and interpersonal connections. Your sponsor agrees to be available whenever you need a strong shoulder, an objective listener, or a touchstone of light, day or night. 

People are eligible to become sponsors after they achieve one year or more of continuous sobriety, thereby enabling them to lead by example. They also should be involved in an effective program so they can assist with recovery challenges such as: 

• Addressing and resolving feelings of guilt, inadequacy, judgment, and shame
• Dealing with cravings and triggers
• Handling adjustments to daily life, especially after rehabilitation
• Effective methods for stress management and managing mental health conditions
• Recognizing when deeper issues need to be addressed by professionals, such as the connection between trauma and addiction. 

Does this mean your sponsor will become your best friend? No. Many programs advise against this. But having a 12-Step sponsor ensures you’ll always have someone you can count on. 

What a Sponsor/Sponsee Partnership Entails

You’re both responsible for the success of this association and to make certain you can work the 12 Steps to your advantage. Here are some key points to remember: 

• Act with integrity. Only with a mutual foundation of respect, kindness, and consideration will this partnership thrive. Your sponsor might not always agree with you, nor you with them. They could shine a light on things you’d rather avoid for your own good. But ultimately, you should be assured they have your best interests at heart. 
• Be honest. Always. When under the influence of drugs and alcohol, some people develop behaviors that don’t serve them, such as lying, stealing, and other negative patterns. If you expect to receive quality support from your sponsor, those behaviors need to be eliminated.
• Honor the commitment. The time and attention necessary for a progressive 12-Step sponsorship is valuable, and each of you should recognize the process and effort. Clearly outline what’s expected regarding meeting attendance, homework deadlines, and other program specifics. This is also a good time to talk about expectations in the partnership.
• Clarify boundaries. Just as a sponsor isn’t to become your closest friend, there are also guidelines stipulating that a sponsor shouldn’t act like a therapist unless board certified to do so, and there shouldn’t be any romantic involvement between the two of you. 

Additionally, take time to choose a sponsor. While you don’t need to have identical personalities, you need to be certain their communication style and listening skills work for you. Meeting first before committing allows the two of you to get to know each other, share sobriety stories, and get a feel for how well you’ll relate down the road.

And don’t be discouraged if there are more than a few meetings like this before you find the right sponsor for your goals. Each 12-Step meeting you attend provides an opportunity to expand your circle of influence. The best sponsor will be available before you know it.

Full Support from Seabrook

Our clients aren’t only based in New Jersey. They come from all around the country for quality addiction rehabilitation. But the recovery skills they learn while with us, such as 12-Step support, wellness management, holistic therapies, and others, are all tools they can take home and build upon within their local sobriety communities. They also have the advantage of Seabrook alumni services.  

And if you’re still finding your way to recovery, give us a call. We’ll help you find the right direction.